Don’t Follow Lindsay…to NYU!
According to Fox News, Lindsay Lohan is considering going to college post-rehab, with NYU as her top choice. And that sounds about right, considering her recent inclination towards all black and cigarette-filled angst. Now I don’t want to put on any pressure here, but it might do her good to get close to the fans that count. Those, perchance, whose names collectively begin with a “L” and end with a “ivvyandStephen.” Because I heard that those two totally transitioned from actual conversation into quoting a 5-minute long Mean Girls scene while prancing up the stairs in the brothel of gay men that they so fondly call home. So clearly, we’re the people to surround oneself with because besides exuding pure coolness, we’re pretty. And good at making people feel better about themselves by quoting their own movies to them, up to and including I Know Who Killed Me, which is a feat in and of itself. Because I definitely lost 11 dollars and a year of my life watching the amputee sex that is actually the only thing I remember from that movie.
So, what I’m saying is, I support Lindsay going to college. As long as it’s before May 2009 (feel free to send me some grad gifts, BTWs. Money and male escorts preferred) and as long as that college is USC, which can also be spelled N-Y-U because let’s face it, they’re the same school. Except we have better weather and less angry people. What I do not support, however, is Lindsay’s continued reconciliation with her father because while that’s great and all, if I have to see that picture of Michael Lohan’s nipples in his see-through mesh muscle shirt one more time, I will actually gouge out my eyes, which honestly doesn’t help my efforts to regain 20/20 vision. Oh, but I’ll also laugh heartily because this was all just an excuse to actually post that picture and….
BAM!! under the cut:
I’ll let you stew in that for a bit and um, I’m gonna gooo…try to avoid nightmares of this man chasing me through the streets. You’d be wise to do the same.
