Oh, hi. I didn’t see you there. That’s probably because you’re not there since you’ve gotten so frustrated with my failure to update that you’re now boycotting the blog. I get it–really, I do. There’s no real excuse for my absence especially since I have my six-day weekends going on and before that I was […]

Listen, I love Sex and the City. Really, I do. And while I was hesitant to celebrate news of a SATC movie, I clearly saw it opening day, cosmo in hand and mother at my side. I can’t say I was surprised to be disappointed by the movie because from the get-go, I didn’t even […]

I don’t know what’s going on in the world today but apparently everyone in Hollywood is taking ugly and/or crazy pills. But being the wonderful person I am, I’m willing to take this time to offer my sound advice and continue spreading good in the world. Because, really, it doesn’t benefit anyone to see pictures […]

Look, Ali Lohan, I get it. You can’t help your face and it’s just so hard to have older sisters who are more attractive than you, I KNOW. But WHY must the solution to that jealousy be looking like a hooker with frazzled hair? And wearing a mesh shirt? I guess I can look past […]

Hey, so here’s someone I never thought I’d be writing about: Gary Busey. You know, that guy who has really crazy hair and his face kind of looks like a monster’s and I think he’s famous for something but I’m not sure what because in my time, I’ve only known him to be that guy […]

It’s rare for me to do a post unrelated to those who hold a special place in my heart like Britney, Lindsay, or puppies. It’s even more rare for me to do a post that completely crushes any facade I may have been keeping up of being a cool, sassy, leggings-wearing hussy. Leggings-wearing I may […]

So, it’s been two weeks and luckily for me, you, and everyone we know, some thrilling developments have occurred in that magical land I like to call “gay town” aka Hollywood. Thus I present to you the following list of “a few exciting things that have happened which may or may not have an effect […]

A few weeks ago, some reports surfaced that Jude Law and Kimberly Stewart had been seen making out at a club but I immediately burned that image from my mind and promptly forgot about it. It’s not that I’m so into Jude or anything and am one of those creepy people who gets all jealous […]

Apparently some group in Long Island gave out awards to mothers of famous children, so it should come as no surprise that Dina Lohan received…wait for it…mother of the year award! Normally, I’d make some quip about this clearly being theworst decision ever made but it’s Long Island. They do things differently there, if you […]

Dear Readers,
IJWLML and newly-blonde Lindsay Lohan would like to welcome you back to a magical time I like to call “last year.” May you get as many DUIs and spend as much time in rehab as she did/will continue to do because as her new hair, animal-print ensemble, coke bloat, awkward hat, leggings and […]